Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Who in their right mind sets out to be a writer? The answer is- you don't choose writing, writing chooses you. And it chose me a long time ago, but I ignored the call- at first. I thought that I wasn't good enough, or special enough to be a writer. I remember being in elementary school as I dreamt about sitting on my bed with a notebook on my lap, a pen in the other, outlining the adventures of the characters I had in my head. But as you get older the doubts begin to creep into your head, twisting and bending your confidence into something unrecognizeable, and let's be honest-ugly. It's not pretty to see someone who doesn't believe in themself. It's hard enough to be confident in oneself in 'real world' jobs, but choosing to go into a field that is riddled with self-doubt is like admitting you enjoy people critcizing you and bringing you down. So, bottom line, it took a while to get here, but I'm finally confident in my choice. Writing chose me, and I love what I do. There are those out there that are searching for an easy way out and think 'I know, I'll write.' But here's the thing, writing is not easy, it's hard. And if it isn't, then you're doing something wrong. Anyone out there that believes that writing is their shot at the big times- think again, that's not going to happen. I have realistic expectations about this journey, and I STILL want to pursue it. That's when you know that you're doing it for the right reasons. I have fallen for my characters, hard. I can't get them out of my head and I continue to pursue their story. I hope that one day someone else will also fall for them and will want to come along on their journey. Until then, I'll be working my butt off to make the story perfect- which is also an impossible feat. The story is never going to be as good on paper as it is in your head, but you continue to give it your all until it's close enough. I'm excited about where this writing thing will take me, it may take years to get there, but I'm patient- I can wait it out. And until then, I'll be working on my craft.